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Showing posts with the label FLS

Ahhh, refreshing!

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I'll be writing soon about why I haven't been writing much. I promise! Meanwhile, enjoy this... Filed under: Pictures

Naps are good... enjoy!

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Filed under: Pictures Funny FLS

Not Dead Yet

Just wanted to drop a post letting folks know that I'm still alive here! I've been down for the count with a nasty case of bronchitis, but I'm finally on the upswing. This is my second "sick" within just a few months, so I think I'm done being sick. Forever. Oy. Filed under: Disability

How did we survive?

Normally, I wouldn't post this joke because it isn't dog or disability related. But today is an FLS day. Besides, the last line of this article does relate to me (my next album is titled "Run With Scissors"!). We Are The Lucky Ones WHO SURVIVED the 1930's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !! First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking. As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat. We dr...

Texas Chainsaw Bus Massacre

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I took Frankie for another bus outing yesterday afternoon. Although it's obvious he still needs more practice, he was much improved. Much less shivering, wasn't as afraid of the mechanical bus ramp beeping , and was able to settle down quicker. In fact, I think his biggest problem is with the constant motion. I can see that he's trying so hard to "grab" onto the bus floor with his claws while still maintaining a down/stay. He's such a good boy. I don't know why, but these bus rides wear me out. Maybe it's because yesterday some guy got on the bus with a chainsaw. No lie. Austin is weird. PS. For all you worry-worts: That guy turned out to be a nice guy!

Regular Sick vs Disabled Sick

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I have to apologize that most of this past week's postings are pictures or cut/paste comments. I've been sick with a sinus infection and it's knocked me down a few pegs. See, that's the thing with some of us disabled folks. While you "normals" might consider a sinus infection a minor inconvenience, for me, it's a pretty major event. Here's the deal: When your body spends most of it's energy dealing with whatever illness is causing your disability... And when your body is already at a deficit because you can't exercise... And when your body fat ratio is 40 percent (although I don't consider myself obese, it's that I have no leg muscles anymore) ...your body deals with a "minor inconvenience" very differently. It can become more like a "major setback". Not only that, but my normal activity, already at a lowered level because of my disability, is cut down even more. I can't do my yoga exercises, as minimal as the...

FLS Day... Explained

Welp, today is an FLS day for me. Not surprising after my two very productive shopping trips (see here and here ) and a day at the range on Tuesday. Even though I Feel Like Sh*t today, I wanted to explain that it doesn't mean that I'm depressed or feel bad mentally at all. It just means that it's a PPD (Pain Pill Day), and that I'm probably dressed in sweats, and that I have no energy to do much of anything. There are PPD's where I don't FLS. And that's a good thing. It means that I can take my pain pills and still function. But on an FLS day, unfortunately there's no drug for body fatigue. Maybe crack. But crack is whack. Oy.

To The Max

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I have a new favorite store: TJ Max Not because they have great prices. Not because they have a very eclectic selection of goods. Not because they have a large selection of clothing. Not because they have hidden treasures. Not because I spent a bunch of $$ there yesterday. Did I mention they have great prices? But because they have no rugs! A Wheeler's Paradise!

FLS Day - Standing is overrated

Unfortunately, all that standing has made me hurtie. Enjoy this: A blonde told her doctor that she was really worried because every part of her body hurt. The doctor looked concerned and said, "Show me where." The blonde touched her own arm and screamed, "Ouch!" Then she touched her leg and screamed, "Ouch!" She touched her nose and cried, "Ouch!" She looked at her doctor and said, "See? It hurts everywhere!" The doctor laughed and said, "Don't worry, it's not serious. You've just got a broken index finger." --------- PS. The WillaWoman is blonde. So, yeah, I have the right to joke!

FLS Day - Our big outing yesterday wore me out

HOW TO WASH THE CAT Thoroughly clean the toilet. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water and have both lids lifted. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lids so the cat cannot escape). Flush the toilet three or four times. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can and quickly lift both lids. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and run outside where he will dry himself. Sincerely, The DOG

FLS day - Three wishes

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As an elderly lady sat on her front porch reflecting on her long life, a Fairy Godmother suddenly appeared and offered to fulfill three wishes for her. "Well," said the woman, "I guess I'd like to be rich." POOF: The Fairy Godmother turned her rocking chair into solid gold. "And I wouldn't mind being a young and beautiful princess." POOF: The Fairy Godmother turned the old woman into an exquisite young princess, with a priceless crown of jewels. "Your third wish?" asked the Fairy Godmother. The elderly woman's dog raised his head and uttered a single, weak, hoarse "woof." "Could you possibly turn my wonderful dog into a handsome prince?" POOF: There, in front of the old woman, who has now turned into a beautiful princess, stood the most handsome young man anyone had ever seen. More handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stared at him in awe, completely s...

FLS Day - Thank God for pain pills!

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How 'bout a cartoon? Enjoy!

FLS Day - Rest and Lizards

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Welp, yesterday and today are not good days. It got real cold real fast here in Austin (in the 80's, brrrr! Hey, it was freakin' 105 on Wednesday). So, I spent yesterday resting and on pain meds. Remember how I talked about cold weather and how much I hate it ? This is my reminder for why I'm a New Yorker now living in the deep south. Last year, the hubby and I went on an RV camping trip (camping? Yeah, right, we had 2 TV's, an XBox, heat, a fridge, and carpet.). We went up to Pennsylvania in October for over 2 weeks, and towards the end of our trip, it started getting colder. One night a fuse blew while we were sleeping and we lost heat. I woke up in the middle of the night shivering uncontrollably. I loaded on the blankets and went back to sleep, but when I got up in the morning, my legs hurt very badly. That same thing happened here Wednesday night. We didn't lose our heater, but a cold front came thru Texas and dropped the temp 30 degrees. At least I can...

Ahhh, I Feel Better Now

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WillaBlog is back! Took a while, but got my domain problems fixed. Just so y'all know, I will soon be moving this blog to my own domain (www.TheWillaWoman.com). You'll be able to use either that link or the current link to access me blog. Yippie! Unfortunately, today is a FLS day, so I'm going to leave you with a joke. Hope you likey! An Unusual Handicap There was this man who was in a horrible accident, and was injured. But the only permanent damage he suffered was the amputation of both of his ears. As a result of this "unusual" handicap, he was very self-conscious about his having no ears. Because of the accident, he received a large sum of money from the insurance company. It was always his dream to own his own business, so he decided with all this money he had, he now had the means to own a business. So he went out and purchased a small, but expanding computer firm. But he realized that he had no business knowledge at all, so he decided that he would have ...

FLS Day #3 - Sick And Tired Of Being Sick And Tired

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Last night, the hubby and I figured out why I'm feeling so crappy. On Sunday, we had taken Willie and Frankie out to a park to play fetch. The park area has a fence on the north and east sides, forming a corner. It's a nice spot because of the fencing and the wide-open space. Behind this field is a small playground. While playing with the boys, a small kid apparently started walking up to where we were. The kid would have been behind me, so I didn't see him coming. Suddenly I see something in Frankie's eyes and I just knew he was gonna bolt. So I quickly jumped off my scooter and moved about 10 feet to grab him. It was the fastest I've moved in years. We think that may be what did it. The burst of adrenelin, the quick response I request of my leg muscles... all this may have contributed to my 3-day Leg Hangover. I guess my legs are mad at me. What a drag.

FLS Day #2 - Oy

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It doesn't happen often, but when I Feel Like Sh*t two days in a row and have nothing to attribute it to, it's a total drag. To lighten the mood, here's a crip-related funny. Enjoy!

FLS Day

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(click to enlarge) Not feeling so good today, so I thought I'd link to this cute dog-related comic by Dog Eat Doug . Enjoy!

Morning Has Broken.... Me

I am not a morning person. I tend to stay up pretty late... 1-2am most nights. By the time I do start making my way from the couch to the bed I am a walking zombie. Even though I get up at 10 or 11am, I'm not "up" if ya know what I mean. You'd be wise to give me wide berth until I've eaten and showered. Two things to note: Don't ask me "how're you feeling today?" right when I get up. I have no idea yet. I hate Cheerful Morning People. One day I figured it out. Why would someone who depends on sleep so desperately stay up so late? Here's why: Before I go to sleep, I know right at that moment how good or bad I feel. But I have no idea what I'm going to feel like when I wake up. It's the fear of the unknown. I never know how good or bad I'm going to feel when I wake up the next day, and it's this fear that keeps me from going to sleep. Once I realized this, I no longer felt guilty for staying up too late. I guess this ...

FLS - Short Post (Feel Like Sh*t)

Crappy day today, so short post. Q: Why don't blind people sky dive? A: Cause it scares their dogs. Oy.

Short -I Feel Like PooP- Post Today

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When Frankie poops, his butt (sorry, backside!) is so close to the ground that his output winds up looking like a Dairy Queen soft serve chocolate cone. Ew. As I always say, as pet lovers, we must love all the inputs and outputs of our non-human kids.