Why Dogs Are Better Than Women

  1. Dogs don't cry.
  2. Dogs love it when your friends come over.
  3. Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
  4. Dogs think you sing great.
  5. A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
  6. Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
  7. The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
  8. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
  9. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
  10. Dogs are excited by rough play.
  11. Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
  12. Dogs understand that farts are funny.
  13. Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
  14. Anyone can get a good looking dog.
  15. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
  16. Dogs don't shop.
  17. Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
  18. A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
  19. Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
  20. A dog's parent's never visit.
  21. Dogs love long car trips.
  22. Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
  23. Dogs like beer.
  24. Dogs don't hate their bodies.
  25. No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.
  26. Dogs never criticize.
  27. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
  28. Dogs never expect gifts.
  29. Dogs never worry about germs.
  30. Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
  31. You never have to wait for a dog. They are ready to go 24 hours a day.
  32. Dogs have no use for flowers, cards or jewelry.
  33. Dogs don't borrow your shirts.
  34. Dogs never want foot rubs.
  35. Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
  36. Dogs find you amusing when you are drunk.
  37. Dogs can't talk.
  38. Dogs seldom outlive you.

Maybe this should really be called Why Some Men Can't Get Laid



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